Let The Sun Shine

 So today I'm having some groundhog issues...

Groundhog Issue #1: I just found out they have their own groundhog here - in Wisconsin. His name is Jimmy. This strikes me as an odd name for a groundhog, but I suppose it really isn't any more odd than Phil. At any rate, now I'm wondering if every state has its own groundhog and if so, the weather can't possibly be similar enough in every single state at the same time on the same day for fifty groundhogs to all see the same thing. So which groundhog's prediction is correct? Or will winter last longer in some states than it will in others? And doesn't spring officially start around March 21^st regardless of what some crazy old guys in top hats think a groundhog sees?

Groundhog Issue #2: If the weather is sunny, the groundhog will see his shadow and there will be six more weeks of winter. If the weather is cloudy, he won't see it and then (drum roll please) there will be slightly less than seven more weeks of winter. Why all the fuss over six hypothetical extra days of spring?

Groundhog Issue #3: If we're assuming that sunny weather on February 2nd means six more weeks of winter and cloudy weather means less than six more weeks, then why do we need a groundhog at all?

Groundhog Issue #4: Since groundhog meteorology is pretty high on my list of pseudosciences, I think I'd really prefer a beautiful, sunny day on February 2^nd over a gloomy, cloudy one. I feel comfortable taking my chances with the week of March 21^st if I can have a nice, sunny winter day as a guarantee. Besides, according to the National Climatic Data Center, the overall groundhog weather prediction accuracy rate is only around 39% anyway. That's less than a 50/50 shot. Bring on the sun.

Groundhog Issue #4: Groundhogs don't write poetry.  I'm just saying...